Remember that suicide is an irrevocable act with very painful consequences to your children.
Please seek professional psychological help immediately… also, call your local suicide prevention line, usually open 24h. In your message 430, you mentioned working with a wonderful counselor: call her ASAP.
1-800-SUICIDE has information about suicide prevention services.
As for the legal matter, stall and put it on hold. Your attorney should be able to offer a variety of excuses. Use the extra time to psychologically heal and build back your personal strength and energy.
Take a little vacation away from toxic influences. Believe me, we all need one!
If you are looking for a support group, check out
Hang in there, my friend, it’s all very stressful, but not fatal enough to kill us.